To move on, you need to let go

“If you’d have gone and sat on the road sign “Lemmens Campus” at the foot of the hill, you’d have never gotten here.”

Our professor in movement studies, during my years as a student in music, aimed this saying at both people and things: to get where you want to be, you’ll need to learn to leave people and things behind – after all, you won’t get anywhere by latching on to matters. Now, obviously, it goes without saying it’s easier said than done, since “you know what you have, but you don’t know what you will have”, dictates as wisdom. Yet, if you want to make progress, you’ll have to let go of some affairs.

What is it that you’re holding onto so firmly?
We all have that one thing we can’t seem to really be able to fully let go: image, salary, a 13th month, a title, holidays, a car (finally, a car!), our wardrobe’s actuality … Maybe you’re living with the illusion that you too must be able to sustain a permanent job, or trying to undertake an independent project which isn’t viable in the long run; “Once the market’s finally ready for it”, you’ll be saying. Stemming from our upbringing, we’ll apply other behavioral compulsions: managing and growing our savings, never throwing away things which haven’t broken down (if it ain’t broke …), or, relatedly, never quitting a (whether or not a permanent) job, …
Considering what exactly it is that we’re clutching onto so badly, can help to eventually (albeit gradually) get over it.

What do you gain by keeping them?
Oftentimes, we humans hold on to things or jobs for what they once were: hoping that one day being able to fit into those jeans from before baby n° x, hoping to be able to sell that one coat because it’ll surely be vintage and worth a lot of money one day, hoping the atmosphere at work from before the take-over will return, hoping that ‘sure thing’ salary will make up for so many things once it lands on your bank account, etc …
A period of rebellion or resistance after a loss or a change is normal. Look at things as they are at this specific instant – and I really mean this instant; evaluate fairly if current affairs still pertain to you as a person. And if they don’t, get them out of your life (or, less dramatically speaking: take some distance).

What would you gain by cleaning up?
For more than eight years now, I’ve been my own boss, and to be fair, I have to admit that I wasn’t sure how to describe my career choice and progression at first: did I make a step forwards, or rather backwards? It almost felt like a regression to say: “I work as a freelancer.” As time’s progressed however, I no longer feel that way – what’s more, is that I almost feel the complete opposite.
Cleaning up will give you room and “space” (unless of course you’re an excellent cleaner and you already have an absolute minimum in work or life clutter surrounding you). Who knows, you might subsequently be starting your own business or daring to apply for a job, after all! Maybe you’ll learn to stand up for yourself a tad bit more, getting you that tad bit closer to how you actually want to be living your living.

As an extra, I’d like to refer to “Letting go is not the same as giving up” for further reading.

Want to get a clear view of what your life should look like?
Come join us in building your vision board the 20th of October in our Leuven office, or make an appointment so we can get to know each other to explore your options.
We are everywhere to be found in Flanders, as well as online

“If you’d have gone and sat on the road sign “Lemmens Campus” at the foot of the hill, you’d have never gotten here.”

And with, during my years as a student in music, our professor in movement studies aimed this saying at both people and things: to get where you want to be, you’ll need to learn to leave people and things behind – after all, you won’t get anywhere by latching on to matters. Now, obviously, that’s without saying it’s easier said than done, since “you know what you have, but you don’t know what you will have”, as wisdom dictates. Yet even so: if you want to make progress, you’ll have to let go of some affairs.

What is it that you’re holding onto so firmly?
We all have that one thing we can’t seem to really be able to fully release: image, salary, 13th month, title, holidays, a car (finally!), our wardrobe’s actuality … Maybe you’re compulsively living with the illusion that you too must be able to sustain a permanent job, or trying to undertake an independent project which isn’t viable in the long run; “Once the market’s finally ready for it”, you’ll be saying. Stemming from our upbringing, we’ll apply other behavioral compulsions: managing and growing our savings, never throwing away things which haven’t broken down (if it ain’t broke …), or, relatedly, never quitting a (whether or not permanent) job, …
Considering what exactly it is that we’re clutching so badly, can help to eventually (albeit gradually) get over said affairs.

What gain is there in keeping them?
Oftentimes, we humans hold on to things or jobs for what they once were: in hopes of one day being able to fit into those jeans from before baby n° x, in hopes of being able to sell that one coat because it’ll surely be worth a lot of money one day, in hopes of having the atmosphere return from before the take-over, in hopes of that certain salary being able to solve so many problems once it appears in the bank account, etc …
A time period of rebellion or resistance after loss or change is normal. Look at things as they are at this specific instant – and I really mean this instant; evaluate fairly if current affairs still pertain to you as a person, and if not, get them out of your life (or, less dramatically speaking: distance yourself from them).

What gain would there be in cleaning up?
For more than eight years now, I’ve been my own boss, and to be fair, I have to admit that I wasn’t sure how to describe my career choice and progression at first: did I make a step forwards, or rather backwards? It almost felt like a regression to say: “I work as a freelancer.” As time’s progressed however, I no longer feel that way – what’s more, is that I almost feel the complete opposite.
There’s always room for improvement concerning cleaning up to get more “space” (unless of course you’re an excellent cleaner and you already have an absolute minimum in work or life clutter surrounding you). Who knows, you might subsequently be starting your own business or daring to apply for a job, nevertheless! Maybe you’ll learn to stand up for yourself a tad bit more, getting you that tad bit closer to how you actually want to be living your living.

To finish up, I’d like to refer to “Letting go is not the same as giving up” for further reading.

Want to get a clear view of what your life should look like?
Come join us in building your vision board the 20th of October in our Leuven office, or make an appointment so we can get to know each other to explore your options.
We are everywhere to be found in Flanders, as well as online.

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